Seeing Blue
by lurv2boogie
Summary: The coldness of the peace surrounding him wasn't nearly as cold as the coldness he had felt since she had left him. And it was just a moment, but still, somehow, enough. [Harry x Ginny. Oneshot, Sequal to Seeing Red.]


**Disclaimer: Not JKR, dont sue. **

**A/N: Okay, so this is a sequel to _Seeing Red_, as you can probably gather from the title, and if you are reading this first I would recommend that you go read _Seeing Red_ first, but you don't really have to, I guess. For those who aren't going to read it first, this is all from Harry's POV, and Ginny is (obviously) the girl he keeps referring to. So you can read it as a companion piece, but it makes a lot more sense if you've read _Seeing Red_. Also, this is set about a fortnight after _Seeing_ _Red_, and he's at Hogwarts. Anyway, enjoy!**

* * *

All he could see was darkness. The terrible weight of the world crushing him, completely without thought, as though he simply no longer had a presence at all. As though the immense pressure was somehow delving deep into his sense of consciousness, changing him, altering him. Somehow. He didn't really care. There was nothing that could really make him care anymore. 

And, inexplicably, it was just a moment. A deep breath in, he knew, and everything would, in a moment, be gone. It took just a moment for the thought to transpire, and then another moment between thought and action. Just a moment, and still, _somehow_, enough.

---

_It was just a moment. _

---

He saw what was around him, watching the ripples of water in front of him collide with the banks of the lake. He saw how easy it would be to walk away, to forget… but he was suddenly somehow seeing _her _falling to the ground, broken, completely devoid of everything that made her… _her_. Reliving that moment, the one moment that mattered more than any other of the hundreds of thousands of moments he had experienced. What a moment to see again, and again, and again, inside your head, a never ending cycle of a body falling heavily to the ground, again, and again, and again--

--and he knew that once it started it would never stop. It couldn't ever stop.

(_Maybe if he tried really hard_--)

Not time, not patience, not anything could stop this coldness that crept inside, like a disease that was slowly eating away at your body, so unlike actually _being_ cold in that you never went numb. You just stayed cold.

---

_-Cold. So cold.- _

---

The moment before the idea is processed, the split second before the decision is made, before the action takes place. Just another moment in a long line of moments. Moments that change your life. Life-changing moments. This moment would certainly change his life. _That moment had. _

He thought, just for a moment, of the sadistic kind of irony surrounding him. Alive, surrounded by people, he was alone. Dead, he would be with _her_.

---

_Just breathe. _

_In. _

_Out. _

_In. _

_Out. _

_In. _

_Out. _

_(Jump) _

_(Sink) _

_Pause. _

_--- _

_In. _

_--- _

All he could see was blue. The coldness of the vast peace surrounding him wasn't nearly as cold as the coldness that had filled him since _that_ moment. Since she had left him. He was alone. But not for much longer.

---

Why wasn't water filling his lungs?

---

_-Cold. So Cold.- _

---

He could feel someone's lips pressed against his, and somehow, inexplicably, it wasn't _her_. The head of the person wasn't covered in violent red strands, but a muddy brown pile of hair. He watched the scene, somewhere above them, feeling separated from the immense iciness of his body. The brunette with bushy hair pressed against his chest, and he felt the coldness lifting for a second, somehow, _inexplicably_. But as she moved her hands from his chest and put her mouth back to his, the coldness came back, flooding his system, and suddenly his eyes were open and staring into the brunette's bloodshot and teary ones.

---

He felt himself roll to one side and cough out some of the water he had inhaled. He did it without thinking. He did it reflexively.

He wished he hadn't.

---

She (but still not _she_) had pulled him out of the coldness. Of the blue. Of the lake.

He was alive, but he didn't feel it.

He was alive, while _she_ was dead.

He was alive.

---

_-but-why- _

---

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**A/N: Please review. **


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